The Ladybug

One day last week, Adelaide told me that she found a ladybug. It was sitting in the lid of a shoebox, just sitting there on the coffee table. I thought it was dead because it hadn't moved a bit and she was kind of squishing it. It was time for her nap and she really, really wanted to snuggle it. So I, figuring it was dead, said ok.

She took it with her and set the shoebox lid on the pillow next to her. A few hours later I went in to see if she was awake. She was, but I couldn't find where the lid or the ladybug had gone to. I finally found the lid wrapped up in her blanket, but no ladybug. So I helped her out of bed and sure enough, there was the ladybug. But it wasn't dead, it was crawling all over the sheets where she had been laying.

I'm glad the ladybug wasn't dead, so was she.

Too Long

I can't believe how long it's been since I've posted. Don't worry it's for a good reason and hopefully I'll get back to it soon. But in the meantime, I have a horrible headache that just won't quit. That's not very uplifting, but hopefully the way I feel when it's gone will be.

4 Years

4 years ago this Tuesday I had the blessing of bringing my little Adelaide into the world. She is such an amazing girl, I can't believe how much she knows and how much she can do now. She has the funniest personality and is so independent. I really can't imagine my life without her and I am so thankful for her every day. Thanks to everyone who came to her party to aid in her being spoiled rotten. It was a great day.

Happy Birthday baby girl.

Hugs Anyone?

We watched this in my Positive Psych class today.

Love it. A lot.



For more info on this guy go to freehugscampaign.org

9-11-2001

Do you remember what you were doing on that day? I remember it so vividly it's like it was yesterday.

I was living at my grandparents house in North Ogden, attending school at Weber State. I had just gotten out of the shower and was getting dressed. I always watched the news when I got ready in the morning. I was running late for school so I didn't really pay attention to what was on the tv. But then I heard something that sounded like panic, so I decided to sit and see what was going on. Just as I sat down on the bed, I saw the second plane crash into the tower. It was the the most awful/perfect timing ever. I couldn't believe what was happening before my eyes.

I ran into my grandparents room to tell them to turn on the tv. We sat in absolute astonishment for a few minutes without knowing quite what to say. Then I had to go to school.

When I arrived at each and every class that day, my teachers either canceled class so we could mourn in private, or we held a discussion on what and why we thought it happened.

I remember crying for those people, crying for their loved ones, and crying for America. I didn't know anyone that was involved but I sure felt like I did. I was amazed that I had witnessed such an insane tragedy. That's all I remember thinking, "this is completely insane."

To this day I don't understand it, I don't think I ever will. I just pray that those families have found peace and forgiveness in their hearts. It is certainly a tragedy that will live in my heart forever. God bless us all.

Her Love for 'Hees'

She still loves horses so much. She was able to ride one on Tuesday (thanks Eric and Jackie). She is in pure heaven when she's around them. What am I going to do when she gets older and wants one of her own? I hope she's ok with riding someone else's horse every once in a while. It's so much fun to see her get excited over something she loves.

Kids have such a wonderful way of seeing the world through their own reality. It's a really great reality. They have a dream and there's no limit to them being able to achieve it. They still believe that anything can happen and they can become anyone they want to be. I've learned that parents "squash" the joy in their children sometimes. I realize there are moments when I do it too. Why do I do it? No reason really.

Why can't they play in the mud? Why can't they color on their arms? Why can't they eat a huge doughnut with sprinkles every morning for breakfast? Why can't they be kids?
I'm trying to relax and let her be. If she gets dirty, who cares? If she wants to wear her shabby princess dress to the store, why not? If she doesn't want me to do her hair, it's ok.

Innocence gets lost as you get older. I'm going to try and let her hang on to hers as long as possible. Let her be who she wants to be. Let her live all of her dreams and hopefully she can continue to keep them in view as she gets older. I hope she wants to wear her shabby princess dress to the store when she's 30. I hope she loves it and doesn't care what anyone else is thinking. I hope she gets her pink horse with a blue saddle. There has to be one out there somewhere, right? I want her to know that there isn't anything she can't do.

She can be anything she wants to be.

A Poem

THE JOURNEY

One day you finally knew
what you had to do, and began,
though the voices around you
kept shouting
their bad advice—
though the whole house
began to tremble
and you felt the old tug
at your ankles.
"Mend my life!"
each voice cried.
But you didn't stop.
You knew what you had to do,
though the wind pried
with its stiff fingers
at the very foundations,
though their melancholy
was terrible.
It was already late
enough, and a wild night,
and the road full of fallen
branches and stones.
But little by little,
as you left their voices behind,
the stars began to burn
through the sheets of clouds,
and there was a new voice
which you slowly
recognized as your own,
that kept you company
as you strode deeper and deeper
into the world,
determined to do
the only thing you could do—
determined to save
the only life you could save.

-Mary Oliver